Persistence- A lesson learned from a five-year-old !


I happened to be blessed with two gorgeous grandsons, aged 5 and 26 months old.   They bring with them so much joy and lots of fun.  I continuously find myself observing and learning from them.  I read somewhere that you should sit and observe OLD people and babies.   My life experience so far has allowed me to do this with some amazing insights.

I am constantly amazed at how much their little brain is soaking up at this young age, and makes me wish my old brain was as reactive and had the capacity to learn as theirs.  Their innocence of how simple life is, really is something as adults we should take on board. As we get older, we make life complicated for no reason.  It really can be as simple as how a child sees it.

I watch how the five year old patiently teaches himself to learn Russian, and is now able to write the alphabet and recite it… no one in my family can speak the language, yet he managed this himself.  Admittingly the new age digital era has alot to do with this.  However, he has taught me that nothing is impossible if you put your mind to it.  I have known this, of course, but seeing a five year old develop his skillset so quickly to learn how to speak and write a foreign languague unaided is on another level totally.

SO here are my takeaways from all my observations:

  • Be Persistant and focussed – do not get distracted and taken away from your task
  • Be Consistent – he practices in every way he can, through writing on an ipad, to writing on paper, to writing on a magnetic board
  • Be Patient  and reward yourself when you have got it right
  • Learn something new every day
  • Teach someone what you have learned so that it enforces what you have learned, but makes you look like the expert.
  • Have fun doing what you are learning, it sinks in easier.

I will share my insights from my elders in another post, but for now hope you enjoyed the above, short but brief insight…. let me know if you have learned anything from young people in the comments below….

 

 

 


 

 

Finding and Defining My PurposeAnd How You Can Too

I have just been listening to a short extract from Bishop TD Jakes, and he talks about Finding Yourself.

Bishop TD Jakes said we are all here for a purpose, and if you care for a person with Dementia right now, that is your special purpose, if you are looking after a child with downsyndrome, or autism, that is your purpose, if you are going through Cancer right now, again that is your purpose.  You have been chosen to deal with the situation you are in because you have the skills to deal with it, sometimes you just don’t know that you have.  You may think the situation is too much and become exasporated , but know this,  GOD will not give you more than you can bear.  Deep….

That is so, true. 

I have gone through being the one to look after a person with Dementia, I have gone through a marriage break up, I have gone through realtionships breaking down, I have gone through health challenges,  I have gone through financial challenges, we all do at some point in our life go through challenges.  But know that this is what they are, challenges.

At the time we are going through our tribulations and trials, we may cry and curse and say why me…. but know this, ultimately YOU were chosen, remember  it is not about you, it is about who you can serve, who you can help in the overall bigger picture, once you get through, because ultimately you will get through,  it is just a matter of time.   What I have learnt in my life so far is that it is never about us, but when we are going through the storm, we can only think about us….

We do not know sometimes, what our friends or co-workers or colleagues are truly going through in their lives, we do not know the demons they are battling, or the strain or stress that they are going through.  Often the ones who smile at you, and listen and encourage, are those who are going through the darkest times.  I know because this was me….

 Let me get personal and let you into my world for a bit….

When my Mother (God rest her soul) was diagnosed with Vascular Dementia, I thought WHY ME….. I was so selfish. I was thinking about myself, how at the age of 48, I had just began to get my life back, get used to having a social life again, begin dating again, as my kids were now grown up young men, and I could live life without worrying about baby sitters, when I was told the news of my mother. 

For me, from the age of 20 when I left home, I was a carer – looking after a boyfriend, later Husband, then Children, to after 20 or so years being free for a few short months, then being a carer again for my Mother.

However after getting over that part of my life, I reflected on the timing of all this, and came to the conclusion, I was meant to look after my mum, I had the empathy, the patience, the love to care for her no matter what.  Because, if she had been diagnosed when my Father was alive, he would not have been able to cope with looking after her.  He did not have the empathy, or patience, or even maybe the understanding of what her illness would entail. So it was left to be my purpose.  What I learned from looking after my Mother with Dementia has truly changed me as a person. It has also changed most of my family who were there to experience it first hand. 

I have gained so much more patience and perseverence and understanding, it has made me more aware of other peoples view points and circumstances, because for a person with Dementia, normal every life can be so frightful and confusing.  What may seem normal to us, is strange and out of place for someone with Dementia.

What can seem weird to us, is actually normal in the eyes of someone with dementia, because they slowly lose the concept of ‘things’ everyday tasks such as washing, dressing, sleeping and eating. Things we take for granted! I learned to look throuigh another person’s eyes, asking questions and listening to their answers, trying to get into their world.  All this was the outcome of looking after my Mother with Vascular Dementia.

The whole experience of going through looking after my Mother was a life lesson for me. What started as looking like a ‘curse’ ended up as me being eternally gratefully that it was a responsiblity that was given to me. It has helped me in my personal and professional life to learn more about individuals, making contact and building trust and relationships. To cherish what you have NOW, to appreciate the relationships you have and build peaceful lasting ones.

So each of us has a purpose, that will lead to to other things you are not currently doing or even think of right now, for some it may take time to find, but in finding your purpose can lead to much more….

So I want to ask you what lessons have you learned from going through trails and tribulations in your life?

Did you find that they helped you and others like you?

 

 

Is Your Imagination Holding You Back?

Bob Proctor also appeared on the Secret Movie by Rhonda Bryne, and he has been practising the Law of Attraction for many many years now.  Here are his thoughts on why so many of us are held back by our thoughts.

If you struggling to see where you are going, struggling to find purpose then watch this short video to help kick start your journey.

It was by studying the Law of Attraction, watching The Secret, reading the Secret and subsequent Law of Attraction books that helped me find myself and helped me to grow spiritually, mentally and develop a mindset of endurance and less resistance to situations happening around me. 

I began to look for the opportunities, and without fail they came.  When I lost sight of my inner consciousness and self, the opportunities dissappeared.  I have and am still learning, that you have to be consistent with your actions, and your thoughts on what you want in order to achieve what you want.

Let me know your thoughts….

 


Colette Morris will use the information you provide on this form to be in touch with you and to provide updates and marketing. You can change your mind at any time by clicking the unsubscribe link in the footer of any email you receive from us, or by contacting us at Colette.healthcoach@gmail.com. We will treat your information with respect. For more information about our privacy practices please visit our website. By clicking below, you agree that we may process your information in accordance with these terms.

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5 Tips To Help You Find You..

 

It took me nearly 5 years to find out who I was, after going through a relationship breakdown. Many of us go through life without really understanding who we are, what we like, what we don’t like, and where we want to be in life.

I went from being a teenager living at home, daughter and big sister, to being a partner, moving in with my then boyfriend who later became my husband. Then became a mother and in all of this time didn’t really have time to find me.

Sounds familiar?

So when I went through my relationship breakdown, I took some time out to try and find me, to try and find you the real me was not this person who was mother daughter, sister, friend.

To hear some tips I hope you find useful because it the stages really did help me to find myself and I hope they will help you too.

1. Love yourself

when you truly love yourself, no one will ever hurt your spirit or the real you again. Learn to love who you truly are. Ask your family and friends what they feel are your best qualities, you’ll be surprised what they put out and send back to you.

Begin to value yourself, you have a lot to give not only to yourself but to those around you.

Look deep within and ask yourself the following:

What are my favourite foods, colours, music?

What don’t I like in a person? Do I have any of these qualities? How can I make a change to remove them?

What do I like in a person? Do I have these qualities myself?

What am I passionate about in life?

What would I like to change in my life/ about myself?

What are my strengths? You might want to ask your friends and family about this one.

What are my weaknesses.

What is the best thing I like about me?

When you can truly answer all of these questions you have a better picture of who you are. You will begin to see who your authentic self is, you begin to have peace within yourself knowing that no one can take away the essence of who you are

2. Be Selfish

I found this one really hard to do, because I am a selfless person and I love to help people sometimes to my own detriment. There is a time where you need to be selfish. You need to put yourself first. When you realise that your own mental health is more important than trying to support someone else you will begin to understand the selfishness to keep you sane and keep you healthy.

When was the last time you treated yourself?

Say no to people, Saying no does not mean you’re mean person. And you should never feel guilty either. This I found really hard to do, but eventually if you explain to people why you cannot take certain things on they do understand and no they don’t shoot you down for it.

3. Dream Again

You may have had dreams at the start of a relationship, but for whatever reason those dreams got batted down or simply got put away. Now is the time to bring them back up again. I found using a vision board really useful if you’re not sure what a vision board is you can google and find out. Basically cut out the things that you want in life and this could be pictures that represent what you want out of life if it’s a loving relationship find a Picture of a couple in love, if you’d like to go on a cruise where would you like to go? If you want a new car, what car, what colour, what interior, if you wanna go on holiday where do you want to go? Get the picture? No dream is to bake, but don’t dream small because you’ll be disappointed if you get them.

4. Surround yourself with positive people

If you find yourself surrounded by friends who are always moaning and complaining, this isn’t going to help you. You need to be around people who are forwardthinking, positive thinking, and who want to do more be more have more in life. This really motivated me and one of the reasons why joining a network marketing company can help you with the positivity around you. No I’m not advocating this for everyone these are my thoughts.

You can join meet up groups that are local to you, and there is a meet up group for every single type of activity you can think of.

Don’t be shy to start conversations with new people, you never know you may meet this way and the people that you talk could be your gateway to your next opportunity.

5. Re-connect with your inner spiritual self

When you have an attitude of gratitude you will start to see things differently.

For me I found keeping a journal really helped, I wrote down all my thoughts and my feelings on a day-to-day basis, along with all the things that I was grateful for. Your core being is your stabiliser physically, emotionally and mentally and you need to reconnect with that, this can be done through meditation, through yoga through prayer.

Find a way to help yourself destress, to help you be at peace. Listening to music, going for long walks, yoga, anything to relax the mind. So these are some of the things I initially did to help get me back on track.  Throughout my blog I will be sharing more so keep tuning in, and do let me know what you have found useful. 

Love to hear from you!

 


Colette Morris will use the information you provide on this form to be in touch with you and to provide updates and marketing.  You can change your mind at any time by clicking the unsubscribe link in the footer of any email you receive from us, or by contacting us at Colette.healthcoach@gmail.com. We will treat your information with respect. For more information about our privacy practices please visit our website. By clicking below, you agree that we may process your information in accordance with these terms.

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Insights from the Road In My Life – Recognise the Interventions

The other day I had to give thanks to the one above. 

He made my car stall. 

Now most people would curse and quickly start the car and be on their way.   I believe my car was stalled for a reason, you see I was at a roundabout and looking to my  right ready to move out.  I saw a car coming round, but thought he would clear past me, so I began to move out, that is when my car stalled, and you know what?  In front of me that split second a car came around which I had not seen, if I had proceeded to move out, one of us would have had a serious injury.

So, I immediately recognised this higher intervention and showed my gratitude not anger for my car stalling. 

There are many times in our lives that a higher force will intervene, could be to direct us, or to push us onto a different path than the one we are currently on. 

It is up to you to recognise those interventions and give thanks, gratitude for them.  Be guided, don’t go against what you have been led to. 

Nine times out of ten it is a much better destination that where you were heading.