Knowing What You Want

Not all of us know what we want out of life. Some of us are blessed at an early age to know where we are going, to understand our purpose. For those like me who only discovered that they have a purpose, this post is really for you.

     Steps to understand what you don’t want 

So the first thing I did, was to get a piece of paper and write down everything that I did not want in my life.  I was being very detailed and very specific   

 I did not want lack of money, I did not want negativity, I did not want anyone  who were self-centred, I did not want the job that I was currently in. If you get the drift,  these are the things that I did not want in my life. 

So, it took me awhile to really write down everything I did not want in my life, and then I re-read through everything I had  written.  Some of it really shocked me, because I was so in the flow that I was just writing everything down I was dumping on the sheet.   After I finish though I felt a huge weight lifted from me, I felt relieved.  

 So I would encourage you to do the same. 

 Steps to understand what it is you do you want 

So now feeling empty, and light at the same time and then I’ll begin to think of the things I did want.

 So I did a similar exercise I got a piece of paper  and I just started to gdt in the flow  and write down everything I wanted in my life.  A Beautiful house, the holidays, being financially free to be able to go anywhere and do what I wanted, what my kids and my friends wanted, and give back to those who needed support from society. I dreamt of outrageous things and I put them down on paper. 

 At the time, I did not have a special person in my life, so I put down what I wanted in that special person and I also asked for a sign so that if he was presented to me I would know it was him that I was looking for.

 I made sure I was specific in my request .   And do you know just three months later after writing that information down I met my life partner who I’ve now been with for the last nine years.  

My life Partner

The secret to knowing what you want, is being clear on knowing what you do not want.

To help me achieve my dreams and my goals, I created a Vision Board, where I found the things that I wanted visually in magazines or online, and then I cut them out or made a picture of them and put them in a picture frame where I could see them every day . This helped with ensuring I get my vision and my goals

You have to be clear and specific on what you do want and to feel like you already have it, visualise it, dream about it, talk about it as if it is already here. Think in the NOW!

Life is not meant to be perfect, but you can enjoy it just the same if you know how to get what you want.

Don’t Hold Onto Your Past… It’s not Worth It!

I have faced many disappointments in life, and I’m sure I will not be the last person to do so.

I have faced disappointment from my career, not being able to progress in the direction I would have wanted. Being held back deliberately by Others in establishment.

I have been let down massively in love and relationships.

I have been let down in friendship and trust.

I could go on.

You see the events we go through in our lives are lessons. They help to strengthen you, to build up you knowledge base, to prepare you for the next level of your life’s journey.

You were born to be resilient.

You survived creation to become you the individual! You survived child birth, childhood, kid adult hood, adult hood to be where you are today.

Your journey in life is unique to you, but areas of your journey will help others walk a safer path, tried and tested path because you have already walked it and came through to share the experience.

Holding onto painful experiences, can poison the mind. It will become a wound that never heals. Negative vibes are not easy to get rid of. You will find that more negativity will come through the people that you meet, through more negative events and situations that comes towards you, until you feel that you are surrounded and sinking with the despair of how will you ever get through.

Negativity will begin to mess with your health, your body will react through a build up of stress, inflammation and illness.

Your mind and mental wellness will suffer, not trusting anyone, being paranoid. Feelings of self worth and self confidence disappears with negative thinking and pain.

So, is it worth hanging on to?

You see when you are going through situations, you may not see a way out. Look for lessons in life, look for the good things in the midst of bad. Move away from the negativity.

Find positive people, put yourself in feelgood situations deliberately. Develop your self confidence and love you first and foremost.

You see when you ultimately love yourself, no one can make you feel bad.

Being Vulnerable is a Strength..

Today I want to talk about vulnerability.

Vulnerability comes from the Latin word for “wound,” vulnus. 

Most people think that being vulnerable is a weakness. Whilst you are feeling vulnerable this may be the case, but exposing your vulnerability in the right arena does help you to develop strength within.

Wounds heal.  – Colette Morris

Being vulnerable and sharing your vulnerability to others shows that you are being your authentic self, you are human, that you do have flaws.

The quote below is from the author Brené Brown – Rising to the top. It sums up really well what vulnerability is and isn’t.

For me becoming suddenly a single mother, home owner and responsible for my children’s futureI felt very vulnerable in many areas. Financially, I just didn’t have the resource available right away to help put food on the table and keep the roof over my head. Mentally, I wasn’t prepared for the stress and the strain of being a single parent with financial burdens and the future of my children at hand, but to stop my feeling this way I soon made these weaknesses a strength, it wasn’t easy, nothing ever is. I was lucky to have the support of friends and family, good mentors and business coaches to help me work things through.

Being vulnerable is not just on a personal relationship level, it can also be on a business level.  As a leader, being vulnerable is something that can be in several areas.   As a Manager, you may feel vulnerable whenever you have to talk to a co worker about their performance, or lateness or attendence levels, it can be difficult to approach, and it either is handled firmly, or sensitively depending on the circumstance.  Those are the vulnerability points within that role.

Business leaders make decisions that may open them up to being vulnerable daily, whether it is gently letting a buyer down, or making a decision about the future of the company which may affect the employees.

Some may argue that they cannot afford to be vulnerable, but there is vulnerability in everything, a decision, a circumstance or situation sometimes not in your control.

If you are feeling vulnerable right now, then seek help, talk to someone who you can trust who can help support you through mentoring, finance, advice and importantly help yourself to heal your own wounds, don’t rely on a Band-Aid to fix things, it does take time. Have faith and move forward with strength.

Self Talk – The Realisation

In todays post I wanted to go through how important it is to have a more positive mental attitude.  It is so important how you talk to yourself internally.  It really does affect your confidence, your ability to function and many other areas in your life.

I know from first hand experience.  My life changed over 15 years ago now ever since I went on a personal journey to find myself.

Listen up to my short podcase (5 minutes) on how important self realisation is and what you can do to get around negativity within you.

 

Let me know your thinking below 🙂

It’s Official, Mindfulness can help with your Menopause Symptoms

Its official Mindfulness, and creating a positive environment can help with the menopause.   It is something I have always advocated in my personal life, having a personal mindset.  But having read this article it brings out a lot of what those of us already in the ‘know’ teach and practice.

Meditation, self talk, improving your outlook on life, how you talk to yourself all adds to creating a much positive experience to help you get through these difficult times.

So I will let you go and have a read yourselves, just follow the link below.

Do come back to my blog and let me know your thoughts on this….

 

 

https://www.menopause.org/for-women/menopauseflashes/menopause-symptoms-and-treatments/make-your-menopause-a-positive-experience